Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The Story of a Yellow Butterfly

Have you ever lost someone that you loved dearly, and then found something still here on earth that symbolizes them for you? So that every time you see that something, or hear that something, it takes you back to a time when they were with you? For me, that is the yellow butterfly. Every time I see a yellow butterfly I remember my mommy and I feel like she is right here with me, fluttering by to remind me that though she is not physically with me anymore, she is always with me in spirit. As I was washing the "congrats" stuff (from the wedding two weeks ago, yes I procrastinate) off my car, a BIG yellow butterfly fluttered up to me, and kinda landed on my car and was still for a few minutes before I watched it fly away, as far as my eyes could follow it. I know that my mom reaching out to touch me today. <3 Sometimes I see a yellow butterfly and I know it's just my mom passing by, other times the yellow butterfly hits me hard and I know its my mom trying to tell me something! My mom passed in August 2001 and ever since then August has never been the same. I tend to get down and out on the anniversary of her death but in 2008 as I was driving(I must add I was actually speeding a bit) to work on that day in August, I actually HIT a HUGE yellow butterfly! I was DEVASTATED. I mean, I hit the butterfly HARD, it was even stuck in my wipers. I couldn't continue on to work with this HUGE yellow butterfly stuck on my windshield, so I pulled over and planned to gently remove it and bury it however I was ASTONISHED to see that when I lifted the wiper to free its wing that was caught, the butterfly started to move again and up in the air it went. I literally started crying right then and there. I know that was my mom stopping by to remind me yet again she is always there, and I also believe she was trying to tell me to slow down and not be so sad on the day of her death. :) Since then, I started a tradition where every August me and some of my closest girlfriends go up to Anna Maria Island and stay for the weekend (the weekend that the anniversary falls on) so now, as I know my mom would want it, instead of dreading the day, I look forward to it, as I know I have not only my mother watching down and cheering me on, but the best friends ever that are willing to drop whatever is going on in their lives at that time to be with me in my time of need and keep me laughing and smiling. I truly am blessed.
Yellow Butterfly Necklace my fiance got me so my mom would always be close to my heart. Even better, the body of the butterfly is green, my dad's favorite color! Both my parents in one necklace :)

I took this pic today. It's a framed pic of my mom, but the mirror allows me to reflect myself in it as well

A quote I always think of when I think of my mom is "When I look to the sky, I know you are there" and that was also symbolized when a good friend of mine bought a STAR in honor of my mom through the International Star Registry! How awesome is that?! What a great gift! Something I can frame, and keep forever, always honoring my mom. She's the brightest star in the sky!
International Star Registry
Map of where my mom's star is :)

Card they send with the paperwork


** Stay tuned for 30 days of truth update later! **

Day 9: Updated @ 8:15pm.
I'd have to say someone I didn't want to let go, but just drifted was my high school best friend. We were inseparable in high school, like sisters. We even lived together for a short time as soon as she turned 18 and was legally able to move out. We started drifting apart when she got involved with a guy. The guy, who shall remain nameless, was not very found of me because of some truths that I told my best friend (she was my best friend! I was just looking out for her best interests!). Anyways, after knowing the stuff I told her, she decided to stay with the guy, and that kinda isolated her from a friendship with me. We drifted a part over the years, not by choice of mine. I am a pretty loyal friend and I made numerous attempts at rekindling our friendship. During the time we were not in contact she married said guy, and had a child. It would have been really cool to be a part of her life during that special time, and possibly be "auntie Heather" as I am affectionately called by children of my other close friends! Though we drifted apart, story has a happy ending because about 5 YEARS later, amidst some issues going on in her life at that time, she decided to reach out to me and gave me a call. I'm glad I was able to pick up my cell that day. Since then (that was about 2 years ago) we have rekindled our friendship somewhat and got to hang out a few times! Though our friendship will most likely never be what it was, I definitely hope that we can continue to stay in touch and a part of each others lives. 

Day 1: Something you hate about yourself.
Day 2: Something you love about yourself.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 4: Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 5: Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 6: Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 7: Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Day 8: Someone who made your life miserable, or treated you like crap.
Day 9: Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.


  1. I literally have tears streaming down my face right now after reading about the yellow butterfly. I am so touched. I don't have any other words... Part 2: I obviously know who you are talking about and maybe I will point said person in the direction of this blog. I love ya! CD

  2. im with you c.s.dixon ive got tears streaming down my face that i can hardlt see august is as hard month for me because i lost a grandson august 4th 2009 we got to spend two days with him but he was already passed that was the hardest thing for me to do and i love and miss him so dearly love ya h.a.bailey